SICHUAN DRESSING & BOUQUET OF FIRE

I’ve never understood salad.

And by “salad”, I mean it in the most traditional sense of plant-based lifeforms being tossed in vinegar-based dressings.  I’ve never understood the idea of it, or the taste of it.  It seems that all salads are ever “dressed” with, are the nonstop BS campaign and PR efforts, the pretence of hippie-wholeness and “feel-good” sentiments designed to talk us into laying down our appetites and picking up that cucumber.  Excluding vegetarianism which is a whole other subject, the only peace I find in salad, is if we could all just admit to the blunt and clear motives of why anybody eats it.

We only eat salad because we have to.  Period.

We eat salad because we don’t want to be fat.  We eat salad because we don’t want to die prematurely.  We eat salad because what, you think you have a choice?   Underneath whatever self-hypnosis, there’s only strictly medical purposes.  And I think that if everyone could just quit dancing around it and just say that.  People would actually eat more salad, because truth, is the most powerful persuasion.

However, after moving back to Asia, that view is slightly, or at least in the progress of, changing.

To prepare vegetables such as green beans and spring bamboo shoots:  Bring a large pot of water with a generous pinch of salt to boil (as if you’re cooking pasta).  Prepare a large bowl of ice-water on the side.  Cut off the tough roots and peel the fibrous shells off the bamboo shoots then remove the outer fibrous layers with a fruit-peeler.  Cook in the boiling water for a few min until a small knife can be easily inserted into the flesh (cooking-time largely depends on the thickness of the shoots).  Transfer the bamboo shoots into the ice-water until chilled completely.  Cut into thin slices and toss with the dressing.

Keep the green beans whole.  Cook in the boiling water until cooked through, just a couple min.  Transfer to the ice-water to chill completely.  Dry any excess water with a clean kitchen towel, then trim off the touch ends (if any) and cut into segments ,then toss with the dressing.

To prepare the artichoke/bouquet of fire:  Bring a large pot of water to boil.

Have 2 lemons cut in half, ready on the side.  Break off a few tough, meatless “petals” around the artichokes, cut off the dried ends on the stem, then with a fruit peeler, peel the tough skin off the stem.  With each artichoke right after peeling, immediately rub the exposed flesh directly with the lemon wedges.  This is much more effective in preventing the flesh from turning brown, than soaking in a bowl of lemon water.  Then cut off the tip of the artichoke-head, and again, rub the opening immediately with the lemon.  Squeeze the all the lemon juice into the pot and toss the squeezed lemon in as well.  Add the artichokes, turn the heat down to simmer, then cover the pot and cook for 30~40 min.  Lots of recipes say they need 40~45 min to get tender, but mine only took around 25~30 min.  There’s nothing worse than overcook-artichoke so I’d say check at 25 min.  To check, see if a small knife can be easily inserted into the flesh.

Transfer the cooked artichoke into a large bowl of ice-water.  Gently open up the petals so the ice-water can seep and cool the interior of the artichoke as well.  Once chilled, place the artichokes downward on a clean towel for a couple min to dry excess water, then gently without breaking the artichoke apart, use a small spoon to scoop out the fuzzy core from the artichoke heart.  Hold the artichoke upward, then spoon and distribute the dressing in the heart, and among the folds and spaces in between the petals (doesn’t have to drive yourself crazy, the oil will seep down even if the solids can’t).  This can be served immediately or you can prepare it a few hours ahead.  Whatever you do, napkins stationed on the side are highly recommended.